Smartass & Sass is a monthly subscription for sassy ladies. There are 4 plans available:
In the month of September, the Shirt Only subscription was $19.95, Box Only was $39.95, the Big Box Subscription (which includes the shirt and box) was $54.95 and a “Small Box” subscription was $21.95. Shipping was $3.95 for the Shirt subscription and $7.95 for the others. Prices changed as of the first of October; see my note at the end for more pricing information as well as for an exciting update on the Big Box subscription.
Each box contains full size beauty and lifestyle items from Smartass & Sass and various other sassy businesses. The shirts are comfy unisex tees available in sizes XS-4X.
This box was paid for by Smartass & Sass. (Check out our editorial guidelines to learn more about how we review boxes.)
First Impressions
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Warning: This review is not for the faint of heart! If you’re offended by bad language, this probably isn’t the review or box for you! If you’re like me and thrive on poor language and bad ideas, this is definitely a subscription box you need in your life! Consider yourself warned!
With that said, September's theme was stellar: “HR Violation!” The theme is hilarious; truly one of my favorites and deserving of a second warning. Lots of bad words ahead; proceed with caution! Definitely NSFW…unless you want an HR Violation!
NSFW…Seriously!
A F*cking 2024 Boxed Calendar - Retail Value $15.99
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It’s already that time of year; time to pick out your calendars for 2024. How did that happen? Is it just me, or did 2023 fly by? Another year gone, but Smartass & Sass has your back with a new desk calendar. They seem to give one at the end of each year and I’m thankful for that because they always find the best ones!
This one, “A F*cking 2024 Boxed Calendar” gives you a hilariously irreverent phrase to look forward to each day. Each phrase is printed in bold letters on vividly colored backgrounds. Since I work from home, I have the luxury of being my own HR department, so I think I’ll line the walls of my office with my favorite days. If you are lucky enough to work in an office where the HR people are as sassy as you, you might get away with it too. Imagine a cubicle, wallpapered in brightly colored snark! (If you actually do this, I’m not responsible for job loss, but send pictures!)
You’re Totally Getting Fired Today Pen Set - Retail Value $15.95
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For once, truth in advertising because this box is not lying. If you use these pens at work, “you’re totally getting fired today!” Though I think that makes them even more lovable. And there’s a lot to love. They come in bright, fun colors and write beautifully. All have black gel ink that flows smoothly and they feel very nicely made. I’m thrilled with them! My friends will be jealous so I’ll definitely be adding a few extra sets to my cart on the Smartass & Sass website because there’s no way I’m parting with my set!
My Shit List Journal - Retail Value $16.95
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I wish you could feel this journal! The box insert says that it’s vegan leather, but it’s so soft; almost suede-like.The purple color says elegance, while the cover says, “My Shit List” in metallic silver. Which is elegant AF!
The journal is nicely made; it has a sturdy cover, built-in bookmark, lined pages and a section for you to fill in the date. A nice feature so you can easily track which coworkers are annoying you on which days! It also looks nice with those NSFW pens and even matches this month’s collectible Sharpie marker.
Death Before Decaf Enamel Keychain - Retail Value $11.95
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Unpopular opinion here, but I love decaf. If you’re a coffee junkie, I can hear you asking: why would anyone purposely drink that stuff? My answer is that I love coffee so much that I drink it 24/7. I’ve got an iced coffee next to me at the moment and it’s after five pm. With as much coffee as I drink, if it had full caffeine, even a squirrel wouldn’t be able to keep up with me!
So yeah, “Death Before Decaf” isn’t my thing. But like I said, my opinion is unpopular. Both of my sisters and so many of my friends are going to be fighting over this keychain, that I know I’ll have to buy more. And I don’t mind that. The holidays are coming and the quality of the keychain itself is superb.
It’s made from a very sturdy metal and enameled with beautiful colors. The ring and chain itself are very strong. I’m super impressed with it. I hope Smartass & Sass continue to make keychains just like this one!
Send Noods Phone Grip - Retail Value $9.95
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Ok, this one took me a second to get, because I’m slow. Maybe, too much decaf! But after I got it, I laughed so hard. It’s really very clever! It’s an expanding phone grip that also doubles as a stand and is decorated with a steaming bowl of ramen. “Send noods,” it pleads. Noods, indeed! This phone grip is cheeky enough to make your coworkers laugh but not so offensive that HR will need to get involved.
Tears Of My Enemies Lunch Bag - Retail Value $24.95
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This is a really nice lunch bag; I’m super impressed! Who doesn’t love tacos? This delicious taco is wielding a knife, ready to protect your lunch. It says, “Contains the tears of my enemies & some snacks.” Big enough to fit both of the collapsible leftover containers from April’s box and insulated well enough to keep them cold all day long. The handles are sturdy and the cheery orange color makes it easy to keep tabs on. Which is good, because it’s likely to make your coworkers jealous. Watch out, that adorable taco might just wander off!
DESK MOODS Card Set + Typewriter Stand - By Imperfect Inspiration - Retail Value $10.00
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I’ve saved my favorite item for last. This little set is the perfect way to express your sassy mood without getting fired. It comes with an adorable little typewriter and a deck of double sided cards that fit into it. On them are a wide variety of funny phrases that are sure to contain one with your mood of the moment.
Every card is something worth snickering over. The hardest part will be deciding which one to show off for the day. I really love this little thing, but since I work from home, I feel it wouldn’t be appreciated enough so I’m going to let my two sisters fight over it. Maybe I’ll grab a second one, if I’m feeling particularly generous…and they’re not on my nerves at the moment!
Your Performance Is Lilac-ing Collectable Marker - Retail Value $4.95
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This year, Smartass & Sass is including a different colored fine-point Sharpie, with appropriately funny phrases, in each month’s box. This is the ninth in the set and the theme, “HR Violation” lends itself well to the name of the color on the marker: “Your performance is lilac-ing!” It’s a lovely color that looks great with the “My Shit List” journal.
I really love the idea of a new marker every month. My set is looking great and I’m keeping them in the “Where The F*ck Did My Day Go” bag from a previous month's box. If you miss a month and want to complete your set, the Smartass online shop sells them individually (while supplies last).
IDK I Just Work Here - Unisex T-Shirt - Retail Value $24.95
September’s shirt is a simple ode to work-life. After all, who hasn’t at least thought: “IDK. I just work here?” It’s a universal feeling, no matter where you work; some days, showing up is half the battle. On those days, it’s difficult to muster up more enthusiasm than this shirt projects. Casual Fridays won’t ever be the same!
While I’m not a T-shirt person, my bestie is so she is always thrilled to take the shirt. She now has 26 Smartass & Sass shirts (with another on the way)! Thank you Jenni, for posing for this photo! According to Jenni, the shirts are true to size, long enough to wear with yoga pants and ridiculously soft! She tells me that every morning she flips through them in her closet and chooses which to wear, based on her sass level that day!
The Verdict
September’s theme, “HR Violation,” is everything that comes to mind when I think of Smartass & Sass! It’s creative, funny, irreverent and of course, smartassy. The theme is stellar and the box doesn’t disappoint.
The curation is exactly as I’d expect in a NSFW themed box. Everything in it is fun, useful and guaranteed to get you an HR Violation! I’m also super impressed with the quality of each item. In fact, the more I think about it, the harder it is for me to pick a favorite item; they’re all noteworthy!
I love so many of the items that, with Christmas in mind, I’m adding many to my list of gifts to buy. It's great that there is a Smartass & Sass online shop that contains items found, and not found, in the box. It’s open to everyone, but subscribers that enter the password on the back of the box insert will receive 20% off of their order!
Keep Track of Your Subscriptions: Add this box to your subscription list or wishlist!
To Wrap Up
Can you still get this box if you sign up today?
No, your first box will be the October box. However, you have the option to order previous boxes from the Smarass store. At the moment, the September box is still in stock!
Value Breakdown: The September box plus T-shirt cost $54.95 plus $7.95 shipping which means each of the 9 items (counting the T-shirt) cost an average of about $6.98.
Heads up, as of October 1st, the prices have changed. Shipping is now included in the cost of each box, but due to inflation, the overall cost of each subscription has gone up a few dollars. The Big Box subscription (includes full size box and shirt) is $69.95 monthly (less for 3 and 6 month commitments). The Box subscription (everything but the T Shirt) is $49.95 monthly. The Small Box subscription (a selection of items from the Big Box) is $29.95 (monthly). And the T Shirt only subscription is $24.95 monthly.
Exciting news: Customization starts with the October box! Currently it’s only available to Big Box Subscribers. They will be allowed to choose up to three items in each month’s box! Customization is open each month from the 26th to the 10th. Subscriptions bill on the 1st and ship on the 18th.
What do you think of Smartass & Sass?
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